gawkers

The lenses of my glasses broke as I was cleaning them yesterday, but other than that, there have been no recent major traumatic events to report. No horrible new injuries, no deaths, no emotional dramas, no arrests. Wait, maybe I was arrested?


Speaking of hardened criminals... Edwin. Everyone seemed to agree that those chops were the coolest things ever, so I had to put a photo of them online somewhere. Ed, as repayment for the use of your likeness without your prior consent on a weblog that I probably haven't alerted you to the existence of, I will give Meridian a free plug.

>>MERIDIAN! MERIDIAN! CLICK HERE FOR MERIDIAN!<<

Unfortunately, Hugh told me about the disappearance of those chops for a certain graduation ceremony. Hugh, as repayment for the use of that information on a weblog that you have only recently been alerted to the existence of, I will post your likeness on said weblog without your prior consent >>

I've noticed that this blog has recently resembled watching a train wreck in slow motion. From my general experience, when hideous disasters occur, onlookers tend to stand back and gawk without wanting to get involved too much. As a result, all of my recent posts have been followed by bemused silence. This in itself is not a bad thing, but because people don't feel comfortable gawking, I've also noticed an increased tendency for people to feign not having read about my exploits in this blog.

Most of the time when people feel like talking to me about something that they have read in my blog, they mention having read about it in a fairly causual, nonchalant manner, which usually diffuses the awkwardness fairly well, particulalry if I don't see these people very often. However, other people, usually people I see all the time, seem more heavily affected by the awkward gawker syndrome, and refuse to admit that they have been reading my blog at all. I promise you, it only makes things worse. Most of the people that I come into contact with frequently have read this blog at some point in time, which has created a legion of awkward people around me.

You know what would solve all of this awkwardness? A lack of gawking. Believe me when I say that I won't think less of you if you leave a little comment at the bottom of this post if you have been reading this blog for years thinking that I have no idea that you are reading this. Even if you're someone that I know who had originally found this blog through pseudo-stalker means and have continued to read it as a stalker, I will not think less of you if you leave a little comment at the bottom of this post. Even if you've suffered through trying to talk to me about one of my little adventures having read about it on my blog, whilst pretending to have not read my blog, I will not think less of you if you leave a little comment at the bottom of this post. Don't get me wrong, I'm not attempting derive an increased sense of self worth by becoming a megalomaniac who has conquered the universe by having people leave comments on his personal website. This is for your own sake. If you feel like ending your misery and coming out as a gawker, now is the time to do it. If you don't know what to say, just copy and paste the following into a comment at the bottom of this post:

"I've been reading this blog. Whew, I'm glad I got that off my chest, that actually makes me feel much better!"

May doing that bring a heightened sense of calm and wellbeing to your life.